Yesterday, I realized I was growing up. It was an interesting feeling. On one side, “hey, I’m almost a real adult! Woo!” On the other side, “hey, I’m almost a real adult! Noooo!”
I’ve known for a while now that I’m about to start me senior year at Cal Poly. Senior year= graduation= job = real adult grown up. For some reason, that hadn’t really sunk in yet though, as much as I thought it had.
But boy did it start to yesterday. You see, yesterday, I made my first adult purchase. I bought a MacBook Pro. All by myself. With my own money. That I made by myself. That was basically the entirety of my savings account. It was scary. Luckily, my roommates were there to make sure I didn’t run from the store weeping.
As I happily spent the rest of the day setting up my magnificent new computer and feeling just a little weird about having the least amount of money I have ever had in my entire life, I realized that this was just the beginning. One day in the not so distant future, I’m going to have to make lots of adult purchases. Like a couch. Or guest towels. Or a lamp that didn’t come from the college section at Target. Holy crap, I’m growing up.
My whole life I’ve been excited to being a “grown up” and being independent. But now that it is less than a year away, a healthy dose of fear has been added to that anticipation. I’m not really sure how to handle it either. I don’t like uncertainty.
Luckily, there are still 266 days until graduation and 266 more days for me to realize I am growing up and that it is okay that I’m freaking out a little. Thank goodness this year is a leap year!
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